take care!

jf is back at canada now. take care and have fun!!! rmb to take lots of photos of mayday and send pee, liting and my love to them. =) one sem will soon be over and we shall have fun again.

one of those nights

tonight is just one of those nights that i dont feel like doing anything except blogging. enjoying my late night playlist, not thinking about anything.

i dont blame others for calling me a workaholic. it is just a name. i dont really care. i understand that life is all about choices. i choose to be part of this project and i should at least try to put in my best for it. i made this decision so i shall pay the price. i dont know how my outside friends view it, but i will hate myself for not putting in enough effort. i choose to be that busy, heavily involved in this project. just bear with me for a few more days and hoepfully, i will be back to being a normal student.

the deadline i once said was end of june, and then july and now, it is finally august and why am i still doing the same thing i did a few months ago? every time i go in, i asked myself the same question over and over again. it is for the sake of money i am not being a materialistic girl here. i am just trying to be independent here, to earn what i spend. up to this age, i cannot see myself begging my parents for money. just substitute my job with tuition and wont i be like normal?

everything only seems to be over after thursday. i need courage to push on till the end of the month. how i wish she was still lying next to me.

sorry, i am too busy

up to today, i still hate the phrase "sorry, i am too busy". that is an extremely clever way to push all responsibilities to others while you have time to do your stuff. get a life!!! do you think everyone except yourself is damn free? it does not show that you are important in all your stuff. it reflects badly on you because you canNOT manage your time at all.

the amount of time each and every one of us have are the same. i dont understand why others can arrange their schedules and make time off but some just cannot do that. there is no such thing as no time. the time is fixed and so you just have to play around with it. you will be able to squeeze time out of your schedule with better planning.

why am i whining here again? maybe i am just looking at things on the surface, which is wrong, bad and horrible. i need to learn not to pass judgement quickly. get to understand the situation first. by then, it wont be too late to make my judgements right?

the world is lying

dont u try hate it when everything is just an illusion? nothing is real. you start to question the people around you. were they showing their true and sincere emotions back then? what if everything has been a lie all along?

why are dramas forever painting the beautiful pictures? the good always has the final laugh. the evil will bleed, suffer and die. nobody cares. all they want is a perfect happy ending that pleases everyone. why? i thought dramas are supposed to be a close reflection of what happens in real life to capture the hearts of the audience.

fake. everything is a lie. reality does not happen in the same way as how the dramas are scripted. i hate it when the bright side wins because i know it does not happen to me. why must reality have a tragic ending before it captures others' attention? it must make people cry their hearts' out before it is satisified. why?

illusion is perfect and reality is harsh. wth!